RELATIONSHIP AND CHOICES

 

Relationship and choices

Relationships as we all know are many. some are blood relationships others are made by choice. Well first of all, what is relationship itself? Relationship is the way two or more people are connected or related. As for choice, one can refer it to as decision or rather an option made independently. To relate the both, some of us choose to be in a relationship with different people or someone except those related by blood.

In this life we need people in our lives besides our own family. And those people can be friends or partners, workmates and many more. Well those people don't come just like that it needs one to go out and interact with the world, meet people and therefore make friends or fall in love. As we were saying earlier, all these kinds of relationships are made by choice. sometimes people say destiny is involved though I can't deny but, still you have to have a hand in it. All of us have a right to choose who we get into a relationship with. It's not like mere friendship whereby one becomes your friend cause you've been there for them and he is been there for you too as well. 

Well, getting into a relationship or deciding on who your life partner should be is a different case, considering that it doesn't only require appreciating each other and being there for one another. This involves commitment, mutual understanding and trust. Loving each other isn't enough for two people to become life partners or married. A lot is required including the above. It's true that some families choose who their children will marry especially the African families. Most of the marriages are fixed by parents and the spouses don't have a hand in it, they only have to agree to what their parents have decided for them. Though I doubt that in this century such marriages still exist. Well you meet someone, get to know each other fall in love and get parent's approval and later on get married. But mostly it's you who have a bigger hand in deciding on who to spend the rest of your life with or  have a family with.

 Many people rush into marriage without considering other different factors besides loving each other, and later on divorce or have family issues like cheating on each other, all because they didn't take time to understand each other or themselves personally, if they truly want to get married or not. Some rush into Marriage just because the partner is rich and he will provide everything, they make themselves believe that where there's money there will be everything which is not the case. Most of the materialistic people end up divorcing or living in a complicated marriage that leads them to depression and regretting whereby some of them commit suicide out of depression or not wanting people to judge them. All these are choices made by one be it the wrong choice or good, but still all of us get to choose what we think is best for us. 

Many people around us, friends and families can interfere by giving advices, showing us who is best for us besides our own choices, telling us to be careful and many other things that of course are needed. Sometimes it's good to have people to challenge you so that you will have to make your own clarifications on what you really want. But still if you don't trust your partner that much then that's a reason to not move on with marriage cause, trust tends to be the main thing to consider before getting married. Many people might come into your ears but they aren't there to decide for you. Some might be right others might be enemies of progress, but still you are the one to makes conclusion. If you choose well it's okay and if you make a mistake it's still okay, don't let it get to you, rather let that mistake teach you to be more careful next time and not to be driven by your desires and emotions. We all deserve to be happy and feel secured in case we are in a relationship but, if your heart isn't convinced enough or you still have some doubts then it's a sign that there is still much more you need to find out or rather you need more time to be fully convinced about your choices.

 To be in a relationship, it requires the two parties to feel something for each other, there has to be some chemistry if I may say like that, there has to be that feeling of love but still the feeling should be accompanied with many things for one to decide on getting married so that you won't regret later or make mistakes. Nowadays that's what is happening to couples, they get married and in not more that two months they are divorced, all because of their wrong choices. Some say am not getting any younger but, there's nothing wrong with being in a relationship or dating for so long. With that much time both of you will have known each other well enough to stand each other and also it's good to see how much you are both committed to each other and if truly you have a future together before jumping into conclusions just because you love each other and it's enough to get married. Some even spend many years dating but end up separating just because they weren't both committed enough or they didn't love each other that much to get married. It's not wrong nor is it a crime to date for so long. If people meet, get married in no time and have a happy family that's good for them. One's fate isn't yours. Which is why we have to be so careful in making decisions. Cause marriage isn't something you rush into. 

You have to be true to yourself if you're ready enough and also be true to your partner, don't hide things from each other. You should also learn how to control your emotions, follow your heart and your mind as well cause one of those might deceive you, see whether you are ready enough to take responsibility of the family you want to start if not, better first settled down financially and emotionally, don't force someone to get married, better understand each other first. 

We all deserve a good and a happy life with those we want to be with but, we also have to be true to ourselves towards what we want to get into, and how prepared we are if we will be able to provide for our family in the end. As for time, don't let it push you into something you aren't ready for. There's is always the right time for everything in this life.